Jan tells her story of the awards!
Initially I thought they had emailed the wrong person! How was I, Jan Griffin, worthy of an award? I’ve never won anything in my life (save a free lottery ticket occasionally which was a buzz) before. I had to send an RSVP and agree to accept this invitation to the Surrey and Borders NHS staff awards dinner as I had been nominated in the category of Carer or Person with Lived Experience’ for making a real difference in educating a wide range of people (including professionals) about FASD and has helped to reduce stigma and inform people about the condition.
So, if I accepted the nomination, I would have to then attend a dinner. I am now faced with a double dilemma, accepting an award which I felt so many other people were more worthy, and then, to sit with people I didn’t know at a very posh dinner. I know my two sons are autistic, but the older I get, the more it is becoming apparent where they might have had the genetic predisposition toward it.
My children inspired me.......
If it were not for my children, I would have run the other way, but they encouraged me to splash out on posh clothes and try to be proud without the incessant feeling of being egotistical. I accepted, somewhat reluctantly, but if nothing else, it got the word of FASD in more people’s minds. At that point, I was completely sure that I would not win the category and would be third so had no fears of having to stand up and say anything nor collect anything.
And......... I won !
Yes…. How wrong could I have been. I did win, and I had to stand up, and I had to walk up to receive my award in front of 200 people. Not an easy task I can assure you. Horrified and honoured at the same time. The best thing was seeing how proud my beautiful son was. He clapped raucously but, more for the fact that I didn’t trip up I should imagine.
Secondly, the wonderful moment when it was revealed that I was a birth mother. The room fell silent whilst the information was taken in. That moment, the sudden recognition that a birth mother does not have to be an alcoholic, poverty stricken drug addict. The moment where it is taken on board that a birth mother could be any and all of us. That is always my message. There are so many of me out there struggling for answers. If I opened the minds and removed the stigma in one person’s natural judgement, then receiving the award is indeed a wonderful moment in my life. I am blessed at having been thought of, I am more blessed in being able to share my story with my son. Pay it forward. No expectations, just change.
